Revelations

[intheheart]

Title: Revelations
Rating: PG-13 for a lot of cussing.
Summary: "Speaking as an engaged man, I am deeply uncomfortable with how much I enjoyed that."
Notes: Kelly mentioned the Thriller Project on their LJ, and I realized I hadn't done anything with it for WAY too long. So I wrote this. Thank Kelly.


Felipe was ignoring him, and Zack was not okay with that.

He'd been elsewhere all night, zoning in and out and occasionally losing the thread of conversation entirely, but he'd stopped even pretending to pay attention about five minutes ago, in favor of staring at the back of the bar and playing with his beer. Whatever he was thinking about must be serious, and it was a best friend and ex-partner's solemn duty to sit and listen.

Even if it meant prying out the information with a crowbar.

"...so then Summer told me she's leaving me for the President," Zack said, watching Felipe closely. "I asked why, and she told me I'm just too blond."

"Bummer," Felipe said, still staring at the back of the bar, but then he blinked, and said, "Wait, what? I thought Summer was straight."

"She is, as far as I know," Zack said. "Welcome back to the conversation."

Felipe flushed and looked down at his beer. "Sorry. I just... I have a lot on my mind."

"Yeah, I figured. Must be serious if it's more interesting than me." Zack finished his beer, then put it down on the bar and swiveled to face Felipe. "You want to talk about it?"

"No," Felipe said, forbiddingly.

Zack had been friends with him for far too long to care about that, though. "Tough," he said, cheerfully. "I'm the one you've been ignoring all night. I think I have a right to know what you've been ignoring me for."

Felipe gave him a slightly sardonic look. "Why do I even bother saying no to you? You're like a two-year-old. You think 'no' means 'whine harder.'"

"Who's whining?" Zack asked, resting an arm on the bar. "Look, man, whatever's chewing on you has clearly got a good set of chompers. I'm your friend. So spit it out and let's see if we can't defang the beastie."

Felipe looked at him for a long, long moment, then said, "Fine," abruptly, and knocked back the rest of his beer. Since it was at least half a bottle, this took a while. Zack spent the time getting into his best "listening attentively but comfortably" posture, a pose he'd perfected in high school.

Of course, this time he'd actually be listening.

Felipe set his bottle down on the bar, turned to face Zack, and burst out laughing.

"What?" Zack said, outwardly defensive but inwardly rather pleased. At least Felipe wasn't moping anymore.

"You," Felipe said, still laughing. "You look like a kid at storytime."

"So tell me the adventures of Felipe Claro," Zack said. "Come on, I'm ready and waiting here."

Felipe stopped laughing, not as suddenly as he'd capitulated, but still too suddenly for Zack's peace of mind. "Oh," he said. "Yeah. All right. Okay." He turned back to stare at the bar for a long minute.

So long that Zack was about to prompt him again when he finally said, "I'm leaving."

"Fine," Zack said, and turned back to the bar himself, signaling the bartender for a new beer. "Don't tell me."

"No, that's it," Felipe said. "I'm leaving. Quitting the force. Tomorrow, probably, but definitely soon."

Zack froze with the new beer halfway to his lips. "What?" he asked.

Felipe's voice acquired a distinct edge. "Stop making me repeat myself. It was fucking hard enough the first time."

This was not the time for a 'that's what she said' joke, no matter how much Zack wanted to lighten the mood. "Why the fuck are you quitting?" he asked, instead.

He shrugged, but the tenseness of his shoulders told Zack he was not nearly as casual as he looked. "Transfer request didn't go through. I didn't really want to leave DC, but, hey, it's probably for the best."

"The hell it is," Zack said, suddenly and irrationally terrified. "You can't leave."

"Can't not," Felipe said, and smiled, a twisted, unhappy expression.

"Why?" he demanded. "I'm here. Summer's here. All your stuff is here. Why would you want to leave?"

"You're here," Felipe said. "Summer's here." Confused, Zack stared at him until he made a painful-sounding noise and added, "Never mind. Forget it."

"No," Zack said. "You can't leave." It seemed very important that Felipe know that, although he could not, if pressed, have said why.

"Too bad," Felipe said, and shoved away from the bar, sliding off his chair. He took his coat off his chair and shrugged it on, then nodded none too kindly at Zack. "I'll see you."

Zack sat frozen on his chair for a moment before the insistent prodding inside him sent him after his friend. He left a couple of twenties for the bartender, then pushed his way through the crowd of guys around the dartboard, shoved the door open and went out into the freezing night.

It had started snowing sometime while they were in the bar, and an unnatural hush had fallen over the city. Felipe wasn't far ahead, standing on the street corner with his hands shoved deep in his coat pockets his head tipped back to the sky, his eyes closed. And for a moment, it felt like everything was where it was supposed to be.

And then Zack remembered Felipe was leaving, and he got mad again.

"Now wait just one fucking second," he said. Felipe jumped, then turned back to him, but he was already advancing on him. "Don't you think you can walk away from me like that. What the fuck do you mean by me and Summer being here?"

"I can't take it, okay?" Felipe wasn't shouting, but something in his voice told Zack that he would really, really like to be. "I can't take this anymore. You're so fucking happy and I'm happy for you, okay, I am, but I can't take it, so I'm going. You two just go ahead and live your happy little life and forget me."

"And just what the hell is that supposed to mean?" Zack demanded, flashing into rage so fast it almost left him breathless. He advanced another couple of steps until he was right in Felipe's face. "You pushed me at Summer! Hell, you damn near locked us in a closet together! And now suddenly you're not okay with us? Fuck that."

"It's not sudden," Felipe said, his voice low and hard. "And it's not that I'm not okay with it. You're perfect for each other."

Zack's hands twitched with the sudden and urgent need to strangle him. "Then tell me what it is," he said. "Because I'm telling you, right now it sounds a lot like jealousy to me."

"No," Felipe said, and to Zack's surprise he smiled a little. "I'm not jealous. Jealousy is believing that you deserve something someone else has."

"I'm not fucking stupid," Zack said. "If you aren't jealous, what is it?"

"Envy," Felipe said.

Zack opened his mouth to tell him not to be an idiot and that jealousy and envy were the same thing, when Felipe put his hands on his shoulders, pulled him one step closer, and kissed him.

When he stepped away, there was a frozen moment of silence, and then Zack said, "Speaking a an engaged man, I am deeply uncomfortable with how much I enjoyed that. What the fuck did you kiss me for?"

"I was making a point," Felipe said. "That seems to have as usual soared right over your head."

"Bite me," Zack said. "And explain before my brain explodes."

Felipe threw his hands in the air. "Fine. You need everything spelled out for you? Fine. I'm in love with you and Summer."

Zack blinked, and thought about that for a moment.

"Oh," he said, eventually. "Okay. That answers that, I guess."

"Seriously?" Felipe said. "That's it?"

Zack shrugged. "Not gonna lie, it's a little weird to hear. But I knew you were bi and I knew you were poly, and I knew you had great taste in women and better taste in men, so... in retrospect it should've been obvious."

Felipe rolled his eyes, and folded his arms, tucking his hands under his armpits to keep them warm. "Would you mind not being flippant for a while? Please? This is kind of important to me."

"Okay," Zack said, and reminded that his hands were cold, stuffed them in his own pockets. "Well, okay. I'm weirded out. That's the first thing. Because, you know, it's... kind of strange to hear that your best friend has been in love with you for God knows how long."

Felipe sighed. "Okay. Weirded out. Great. Thanks. It's been about three years, as near as I can figure, but I didn't realize it for a while."

"Later," Zack said. "I'm not finished. I'm also flattered."

"Zack," Felipe said, in his 'I'm being very patient' tone, "if this sentence ends with 'but you're just not my type,' I'm going to punch you in the face."

"Hold off there, Rambo," Zack said, putting a hand on his chest, not entirely to hold him back. "I'm not done yet."

Felipe went very still, and looked down at his hand. "All right," he said, his voice sounding a little strange. "I'm listening."

"Don't do anything stupid," Zack said. "Not yet. Give me a day."

"And what are you going to do with it?" Felipe asked, still in that strange, tense voice.

"Talk to Summer," Zack said. "Seriously. Twenty-four hours and then you can do stupid things like leave. But give me that day."

For a moment there was nothing but the quiet hissing of the snowfall, and Zack held his breath.

"All right," Felipe said. "Twenty-four hours."