Just Before the Battle
Jun. 21st, 2019 08:46 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
intheheartTitle: Just Before the Battle
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Some people cope with humor.
Warnings: mention of explosions, immediately pre-battle, joking/serious discussion of death.
Notes: Needed a few extra words for today's word count and the prompts inspired me.
"I can't see what's happening," Ivy said, who even on tiptoe was too short to see over the barricade. "Are we boned?"
Aaron, beside her and considerably taller, sighed. "Yeah, we're boned."
"Will you two quit quoting Futurama please," Jake said, through his teeth.
"Look, if we're going to die..."
"Statistically speaking," Aaron cut in, "you're more likely to survive a war in the army. More civilians die than soldiers."
There was a pause, and then Ivy said, "So... we're boned."
"Let's hear it for the militia," Lars muttered.
Danny, atop the barricade, rolled her eyes so hard it was nearly audible. "You guys did volunteer for this," she said.
"Well," Ivy said, "if volunteering means I can't complain about my inevitable horrible death, I demand to be drafted."
"Fuck off, you're too short."
Ivy moved her rifle to the crook of her arm and amiably flipped Danny the double bird.
"Can we please," Jake said, "die with some form of dignity and brotherhood."
Aaron snorted. "Yeah, right."
"It is us," Ivy added.
"Oh ye of little faith," Danny finished. "Now shut up, they're about to hit the mines." She'd hardly finished speaking when the first explosions echoed across the field.
The restless troops sobered somewhat, all five of them. "Seriously," Ivy said, quietly. "I get that we're fucked, but I'm kind of glad I'm fucked with you guys. If that makes any sense."
Aaron slung an arm around her and kissed the top of her head. "Me too."
"It'll be an honor," Lars said. "A painful, pants-shittingly terrifying honor, but hey, I'll see you in hell."
It was Jake's turn to snort. "Yeah, right. I'll be laughing at you all from heaven."
Danny dropped down from the barricade and said, "Okay, t minus five minutes, give or take. Don't actually aim for anybody because none of you guys are going to hit 'em, but try to keep them jumping. We'll buy enough time for everybody to get out, at least."
"Morituri nolumus mori," Lars said, and moved to his crack in the wall, propping his rifle against his shoulder.
Danny gave him a weird look. "What?"
"We who are about to die don't want to," Ivy translated. "Terry Pratchett, observant as ever."
Jake sighed. "Well, at least it's Terry Pratchett."
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Some people cope with humor.
Warnings: mention of explosions, immediately pre-battle, joking/serious discussion of death.
Notes: Needed a few extra words for today's word count and the prompts inspired me.
"I can't see what's happening," Ivy said, who even on tiptoe was too short to see over the barricade. "Are we boned?"
Aaron, beside her and considerably taller, sighed. "Yeah, we're boned."
"Will you two quit quoting Futurama please," Jake said, through his teeth.
"Look, if we're going to die..."
"Statistically speaking," Aaron cut in, "you're more likely to survive a war in the army. More civilians die than soldiers."
There was a pause, and then Ivy said, "So... we're boned."
"Let's hear it for the militia," Lars muttered.
Danny, atop the barricade, rolled her eyes so hard it was nearly audible. "You guys did volunteer for this," she said.
"Well," Ivy said, "if volunteering means I can't complain about my inevitable horrible death, I demand to be drafted."
"Fuck off, you're too short."
Ivy moved her rifle to the crook of her arm and amiably flipped Danny the double bird.
"Can we please," Jake said, "die with some form of dignity and brotherhood."
Aaron snorted. "Yeah, right."
"It is us," Ivy added.
"Oh ye of little faith," Danny finished. "Now shut up, they're about to hit the mines." She'd hardly finished speaking when the first explosions echoed across the field.
The restless troops sobered somewhat, all five of them. "Seriously," Ivy said, quietly. "I get that we're fucked, but I'm kind of glad I'm fucked with you guys. If that makes any sense."
Aaron slung an arm around her and kissed the top of her head. "Me too."
"It'll be an honor," Lars said. "A painful, pants-shittingly terrifying honor, but hey, I'll see you in hell."
It was Jake's turn to snort. "Yeah, right. I'll be laughing at you all from heaven."
Danny dropped down from the barricade and said, "Okay, t minus five minutes, give or take. Don't actually aim for anybody because none of you guys are going to hit 'em, but try to keep them jumping. We'll buy enough time for everybody to get out, at least."
"Morituri nolumus mori," Lars said, and moved to his crack in the wall, propping his rifle against his shoulder.
Danny gave him a weird look. "What?"
"We who are about to die don't want to," Ivy translated. "Terry Pratchett, observant as ever."
Jake sighed. "Well, at least it's Terry Pratchett."
